Sometimes, I want to run home, crawl under the covers, and hide
Sometimes, I wish I had never grown up
Sometimes, I wonder if I am depressed
Sometimes, I think that maybe my stomach issues are stress related, and thus, really self inflicted
Sometimes, I have nights where I just sit in my apartment and cry
I am not terminally ill
I am not living in a third world country
I have everything that I want
I live in a beautiful neighborhood in a beautiful city
And yet I feel sorry for myself for not reaching my self inflicted goals on my self made timeline...
And then I feel guilty for being such a horrible person
I try to be positive
I try to put it in perspective
I try to move forward with a smile on my face
But then something inside of me sucks me down into a whirlpool of darkness
And I just want to cry again
And then I read something from one of the brave women who are friends from miles away
Like Nina or Lindsay or Hannah
Or especially this guest post on my new favorite Living in Yellow by Lauren that hit really close to home
And I realize that, if nothing else, I'm not alone.
Thank you, to all of you, for being there, inspiring me to write and publish my own therapy
And most of all, for being honest.